15 Things Nobody Tells You About Pregnancy

Hey guys,

I saw a YouTuber do this video online and thought it seemed like a fun idea for my next blog post. These are things I personally did not know about pregnancy, you may know every single one of these things or they may not apply to you, but to me they did. Sorry for the random order, it's been a late night with my twin boys so I have randomly compiled this list. There will also be a video to come on this topic so subscribe to my mum and baby channel (link at the bottom of this post), for that.

1. Breastfeeding isn't easy. Now I know you probably know that, but what I mean is, some women really REALLY struggle, so much so, that it just won't happen for them. I bought books on breastfeeding that I read when I was pregnant, little did I know that something I thought would come so naturally to me, didn't. My boys couldn't latch on, for all the midwives that visited me in the week I was in hospital, and the weeks thereafter. It just didn't happen, and I felt so guilty and like a failure at the time, but I tried my best and expressed until my milk ran out and that's all I could do.

2. Your body will NEVER be the same again. Now I know that sounds pretty horrific, but pregnancy does change your body shape. For some lucky women they almost get back to their previous body shape, but I know for a lot of women, myself included, things are going to be different now.

3. You will actually SEE your baby move when looking at your belly. Yes, that's right, you heard me correctly. I had no idea about this, and I was used to people saying 'my baby kicked me', but you never expect to SEE your baby moving. Obviously, when thinking about it if you're being attacked on the inside, it's going to show on the outside. Towards the end of my pregnancy I would just have heads, bums, elbows etc. poking out of my belly constantly, I think my twins were having a party!

4. You aren't eating for two. Sadly, you don't need to eat much more, and there are a lot of foods to avoid so make sure you check out what you can and can't eat. Sometimes pregnant women think that they are able to eat a lot more, but then when it comes around to it remember you've got to lose the excess weight you've put on after your pregnancy.

5. Pregnancy is scary. I was a high risk pregnancy which added even more fear to it, but as a worrier anyway pregnancy is a rather scary thing. Apparently 1 in 3 pregnancies ends in a miscarriage*, and that haunted me throughout my pregnancy. Not wanting to scare anyone with that, it's just something I was not aware of. To be honest I only thought there were complications if you had a history in your family of illnesses etc. How naive I was! *Please note, this number does vary, I've heard it also be 1 in 5 or 1 in 7 etc. regardless, it's still a scary statistic.

6. Being pregnant is like entering a new club you never knew existed. Mothers you've never spoken to before will chat to you about everything baby, and until you become a mother this may not be so interesting. I know for me I wasn't that bothered about chatting about my pregnancy with random strangers, but now I have children of my own I probably talk too much about everything baby.

7. Your waters may not break. You know in the movies you always see the woman's waters break and a mad dash for the hospital? Well, it's actually quite rare that your water will break, and even if it does, there's no mad rush to the hospital. If anything you'll be asked to wait it out at home until your contractions become more frequent.

8. Labour isn't a quick thing. I really didn't realise that it wasn't like on TV, but actually labour is a looooooooooooong process; mine was 18 hours and would have been longer if I didn't need a C-Section. If only it were like the movies...

9. Friendships may disintegrate before your eyes. Those friends who don't have babies or who are TTC may want nothing to do with you and your baby talk. There may be jealousy from those who want a baby of their own. Sometimes people think 'you've changed' because you don't have the same social life, or because you put your unborn child and your need to rest your pregnant self, ahead of meeting up with them. True friends will always be there for you.

10. The amount of advice you will get from everyone and anyone in regards to how to raise your unborn child. Please note: this will not stop when your baby is born, and if anything the advice gets worse. Just remember YOU are this babies mother, even if you've never been a mother before. When people tell you how to raise YOUR baby, smile and nod and take it with a pinch of salt, unless the information is helpful.

11. Relationships will be strained. Your hormones are high, you may be dealing with financial stress, it may have been an unexpected pregnancy, and maybe your partner panics about becoming a dad. Even if this was planned, once you're pregnant you may be shocked about the whole thing, and a little scared. Remember to try and ride things out and stress as little as possible in order to keep you and your baby relaxed.

12. Labour is scary. Yes, you heard me. Of course it's scary, that baby you've been growing for 9 months is ready to come out and your life will never be the same again. Also, labour is an unexpected thing and you just don't know how you'll end up giving birth. I didn't know that being induced I'd give birth the following day via C-Section! However, giving birth is NATURAL. How do you think women did it back in the days when there was no medication or assistance? It is scary, but there is so much that can be done to numb the pain that you'll be fine, especially if you get an epidural ;)

13. Your unborn child will kindly wee, poop, hiccup and release gasses into your belly. You'll even feel the hiccups and see your belly wobble. Your little one may also be more active when you want to go to bed, which is just a sign to show you how awake they'll be at night when they're out of your tummy!

14. Braxton Hicks are fake contractions you feel during your pregnancy, you may also feel real contractions towards the end of your pregnancy that you mistake for braxtons. Not only that but once your labour is over you'll still experience contractions for some days after. 

15. You will lose all self respect after so many people see your private area (lol), the amount of people who have seen my bits now is just ridiculous. I was so worried about people seeing my private area but now I don't care, that's what pregnancy does to you, makes you lose all dignity you once had!

Pregnancy is tough and can be scary for a first time mum. Just remember that it is normal, and that some women may act like their pregnancy was a breeze, but in reality they get constipated, vomit day and night and even if they don't get morning sickness, they've still got to push a baby out just like you do.

Good luck with your pregnancy, and let me know if you have anything to add to this list! :)

Why not check out my YouTube Mum and Baby Channel, for more mummy chat!

Lots of love,

Samantha Dawn

xoxo 

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My Twin Labour Story - #VEDA Day 4

Hey guys,

For #VEDA day 4 the topic suggestion given by We Blog We Vlog is to talk about your best day ever, which for me has to be when my twin babies were born. Obviously it wasn't the best day in the sense of wanting to re-live it over and over, as, to be honest experiencing that once was quite enough. However, my life changed after that day, and I thought I'd share with you my personal story so you can get to know me better.

Instead of boring those of you watching my YouTube VEDA videos who don't want to hear about labour, I thought I would put together a montage of videos and pictures to show you how my life has changed from that day up until now.

For those of you who are interested to read about my twin birth story, read on...

Towards the end of my twin pregnancy, like any full term pregnant lady, I was ready to pop. I could barely walk up the stairs and resorted to using my partners hiking stick, which he'd used when he went travelling in Peru... who would have known that would come in handy again! Basically, I was absolutely huge, very uncomfortable and with two sets of hands, elbows, knees and feet knocking about in your belly, I was ready to meet my boys. 
Waiting for my induction date did feel like forever, I eventually found out about a week before the actual induction itself, and so I was to be induced on the 4th December 2012, at 8am. 

I can remember the night before I put on my hypnotherapy CD one last time, and I lay in bed feeling sick with nerves. I doubt I got much sleep at all, what with the boys going crazy at night in my belly (a sign of the crazy nights to come), but also I was terrified. I was new to labour and I just didn't know how I was going to get through this experience. My plan was to experience labour naturally, as that is what my doctors and consultants had pushed for, secretly I wanted to opt in for a C Section, as I knew 50% of twin births end in one anyway. I think my biggest fear was giving birth to one baby naturally and then having to have the C Section anyway.

So this is me on the morning of my induction, which was on the 4th of December, can you tell I'm nervous? I had barely any sleep and I really was ready to pop, we'd put up our Christmas tree early as we knew we wouldn't have time once the boys arrived!

I can remember vividly the taxi ride to the hospital, and that feeling of excitement and nerves at what was to come. I walked into the maternity unit, this was the room that I would wait in until I was dialated enough to go through to the labour ward. I got linked up to an oxycontin drip in order to get the contractions starting, and from then on it was just a waiting game. A lady on the opposite bed to mine was already screaming out in agony every time she experienced a contraction, little did I know we were as far along as each other. At this point I looked over to see Brad, my partner, asleep in his chair - thanks Brad! Whilst he slept I got linked up to a monitor so they could hear the babies heartbeats, so I was sat with my giant belly strapped up, listening to heartbeats that sound like two horses galloping. The contractions were getting stronger now, but I still wasn't really in too much discomfort. It was only after the whole labour was over that I realised I had definitely experienced contractions in the run up to my induction, I just put them down to being braxton hicks but they were probably early signs of labour. So as the woman opposite me sat screaming on her bed with her worried looking husband, I sat calmly (well, sort of), waiting for it all to kick off whilst Brad got a good nap. At least one of us could! This picture is awful, but you can even just see how exhausted I was - and this was just the beginning.

At one point I remember the contractions did get stronger, still I wasn't in too much pain, and I was consistently focusing on my breathing. I was amazed at how in control I was, as the main thing that terrified me about labour was the lack of control you have over the situation. But my way of coping was to focus literally on the moment I was in right now, and I allowed myself to focus on what was going to happen next, I made sure I asked every time I wanted to know what was to happen next, e.g when I was going to move onto the labour ward.

Eventually, after a few walks around the hospital I was dilated enough to move to the labour ward, I was actually in shock as I seriously hadn't felt any pain just discomfort. However, as I walked into this room and looked at the bed I started to realise this was all going to happen and there was nothing I could do about it...

How scary is that room? There was a massive birthing pool just behind where I was standing to take this photo, but unfortunately I didn't get a chance to use it due to being a high risk pregnancy.

Anyway, a lot of what I am to talk about now is a bit of a blur. I remember in this room the contractions did get more intense, I never screamed when they happened, they were manageable as long as I took deep breaths. Here's a photo of me with 'the last supper', they brought this to me as I'd been in the hospital so long, although it did make a reappearance later all down my hospital gown (lovely), here's me looking very light headed on gas and air having some food:

After this the anesthetist came in to give me an epidural, the contractions were getting stronger now. It took at least 8 times until the epidural actually worked, and that was because my spine was curved due to carrying twins, so the anesthetist kept putting the needle in wrong, needless to say my back hasn't been the same since then.  
I know that the epidural took away the pain, but I had it early so I didn't really experience any pain.

The next couple of hours were spent trying to push Twin 1 out. Everyone who examined me could feel that he was 'very low', and said he was in a great position. After hours of pushing and not feeling anything due to the epidural, the surgeons came in to tell me they wanted to try forceps.
This was an absolutely horrific idea to me, I was terrified of being cut down there, but being surrounded by surgeons and exhausted I signed the papers and just wanted these babies out.

Once in surgery this is when things turned worse, the epidural wore off and I immediately went from feeling absolutely nothing to a surge of extreme pain. I screamed and the hospital surgeons who were preparing to use forceps said absolutely nothing and kept preparing the room for the forceps delivery. This was definitely the worst bit of my labour, I remember shouting out 'I'm dying' and nobody would listen to me or give me any comfort and tell me I was okay, that's all I was desperate to hear. 

Eventually a nurse came over and tried to help by giving me lines from my hypnotherapy CD that she must have also listened to. During another increase of pain she asked me 'where did you last go on holiday' and 'imagine yourself on an island', and all I could think of was telling her where to go. I think I ended up just telling her I didn't want to talk about that, and asked Brad to talk to me about my cats, which distracted me slightly from what I was going through.

The hideous forceps came towards me and I blurted out that I didn't really want to go through with this. They hadn't actually cut me open which I was so grateful about, but they did still want to try the forceps. After trying for about 3 minutes they realised twin 1 was just too cosy in there, and the surgeons came back over to tell me I was going to have a C-Section. HALLELUJAH!

By this time the anesthetist came back through (thank goodness) and dosed me up on more drugs for the c-section. Moments later the curtain was up and it was all happening, I wasn't even nervous any more just exhausted and ready to get this whole day over with. By this time it was approaching 5am and I didn't even know how I'd been awake all day and night, it's not like I slept the previous night either!

All of a sudden behind the curtain I heard a cry, and realised that was my baby! I never thought they'd cry at birth I always thought I'd be panicking as they tried to resuscitate my babies, but I was so lucky to hear a loud healthy cry. Dylan, twin 2, aka the smaller twin was born first, followed by Twin 1 - Sebastian, who had lodged himself into my pelvis.  

I remember hearing the midwives say how gorgeous they were as they cleaned and dressed them. Brad brought them over for me to see, but being stitched up laying flat on the operating table I was unable to get a look and just saw a bundle of sheets.
It was only when being wheeled out of the delivery room I was able to see my babies. They were put into either side of my arms, which was not the most ideal thing seeing as I was so exhausted and at that point they were quite heavy.

We then went into a recovery room, where I was immediately told to start breastfeeding, and pretty much left to attempt it myself. I'll write a separate post on my breastfeeding twins story, as that's quite a lengthy one.

I hope you found my labour story helpful. If you're pregnant with multiples now, congratulations, and try not to stress about it being a high risk pregnancy. Also, try to remain calm about the labour. Whilst labour is a very scary thing, women have been doing it since the beginning of time, and these days there is so much that can be given to help you out.

If I could go back and do it again, or if I become pregnant with twins again in the future, I will probably opt for a C-Section. In my opinion, I went through a lot more pain and was so exhausted after attempting a natural labour too, that I wish I'd never even tried to give birth naturally. I'm not saying you shouldn't try if you want to as 50% of twin mothers can give birth naturally, but if you are worried or concerned about it and would prefer to have a section, then by all means talk with your consultant about it.

I'd love to hear from you if you're a twin mum, or if you're pregnant with twins, leave me a comment and please subscribe to my YouTube channel for more videos like this:




Lots of love,
Samantha Dawn
xoxo

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